I must say, my kids are the cutest kids on the planet in their Halloween costumes. Spencer is an ice cream cone with sprinkles and his hat is the top of a cherry. And Carson is a fireman. Very fitting right now I think. Have a good one guys!

Ok I so hate Halloween!!

The financial aid office (just below my office) has one of those damn motion sensors that keeps screaming and scary laughing when anyone walks past... it is SOOO annoying!

That reminds of a time when I was in Alaska and my friend Alice and I went to the mall. This gross, giant, freakshow lady walked into the bathroom just as Alice did. When Alice came out a minute later she looked like she was about to puke and said, "Oh my God! I could smell her coochie!" How's that for a scary Halloween tale?

Re: Smoker Lady
1- Our smoking beeatch does not go to the bathroom after she smokes, she goes straight to whatever meeting she is late for because she NEEDED to get in a quick (or not so quick) smoke before the meeting. She then makes the whole conference room stink and we can't open the door to let the stench out because we will be disturbing other people.
2- Once, when I caught her perfuming in her cube, I said, "What's that smell?" making the most disgusted face you can imagine on me. She said, "Oh, it's my Ralph Lauren hand lotion. I love it." She smiled as if we were old friends. I said, "It's really strong," with the same disgusted face. I think she said something about not using it anymore but I have definitely smelled it since. Fortunately, she is two cubes away now instead of right next to me. (Poor Adam and Paul.)

Don't you hate it when your IS guys are sitting at your computer and your friend IM's you and then they respond to her? Actually I thought it was funny because my IS guy is cool, but you were worried! At least he didn't pretend it was me. He did that with someone else. Moving on...

Michelle or Adam, I have questions that I NEED (as Carson would say) you to ask smoker lady.

1) Why must you always go to the bathroom after you smoke? Because then you make the bathroom smoke stinky.

2) Why must you always try and cover up the smell of your stinky smoke with even stinkier perfume? Then you just reek twice over. People then know that not only do you smoke, but you are also delusional and have poor choice in perfume.

This rant/questioning was brought on by beehive haired old smoker lady who always goes into the bathroom after smoking while wearing hideous perfume, and then she took a crap. Take about a potpourri of horrible oders. Yikes.

I hate that! Just don't shave... ;)

My armpits are irritated. (So is this their peeve or mine?) I rushed through the shaving this morning and they are chafed.

....because HE will call (email) back.

AAAKKK!!! I hate waiting for someone to call me back (and no, Michelle, it isn't a boy this time)...

I hate having to install stupid Microsoft patches on my computer at work. What do we have an IT department for? I know that they can just push these to our machines involuntarily. How dumb is it to have us do it ourselves? So dumb.

One more - (My I'm peevy today) Phone systems that don't allow you to just press (enter number here) to get to the operator or the person who is taking your call while the contact is out of office. How dumb is it that I had to hang up and call again??!!

hiccups again...

Grrr... people who make an appointment with me and don't show up. The fact that I have to pee but have been waiting because this guy was supposed to be here 20 min ago...

Babies in public places who are screaming (bookstore below my office) yet the parents don't do anything...

We have the worlds worst toilet paper here at the U... it is 1 ply and rough... :(

having the hiccups...

Another peeve... my brownie troop is down to 4 - 5 girls. Now I don't mind I like the smaller troop, BUT it is difficult sometimes with so few girls... and the two mothers who were the most bitchy and complainey about wanting a troop... their daughters have stopped coming with no word as to why or even that they are quitting. I had to hear it unofficially from the other girls.

I hate the pants I'm wearing. Michelle and I have discussed them before and I just need to find a dry cleaner to take them to to take them down but in the mean time I just keep bitching about them because I think they are too short and I am always uncomfortable in them...

One of the things I have to do for my job is enter the bus pass information so that the deductions get set up correctly and we know who has purchased them blah blah blah... Once a month a report gets run from the system as to who has a bus pass for that month. After that I'm supposed to email this guy the info... here's my peeve... every day when I make bus pass changes I email him... why?? He takes forever to read them. I frequently say 'if you would like this in a different format or don't need this info at all please let me know'... but no... I get no response and 4 - 5 days later he actually reads one of the bus pass emails... why bother?? really...

I thought I could handle powdered hot cocoa, but it doesn't taste as good as Starbucks... (OMG the horror! I'm becoming a true Seattleite... oh no I'm not... most of them don't like Starbucks... :) phew...)

Hey Adam, welcome to our bitch session. (See Michelle, I'm posting two days in a row!)

My current list:

People who slow down to look at the fires. Have you never seen fire before? Speed the fuck up so I can get to work because I really must pee.

Bosses that send you a final document have you format it and resend it to them. Then two hours later ask for the same document. What the hell did you do with it the last time I sent it to you you freaking dipshit?

Definitely! :)

(Not a peeve)
Welcome, Adam. This gripey list needs a shot of testosterone.

I hate that I am sometimes a stupidhead...

I hate this little lip around my red robin child's cup that gets juice or soda stuck in it and i have to wash it extra good...

My work computer is tempermental and needs yet another new hard drive... this would be 2 in 2 months....

Beloved Jakob (computer)'s battery is no longer charging or holding a charge. I may have to get a new one... :(

Hey there. This is Adam. (ps - Thanks for the invite Michelle.) I wrote a Haiku about one of my cubemates. It goes like this...

shared adoration
squelched by a foul narcissist
reeking of daftness

translation (not in Haiku format)...

everything was great for the 3 days that the smelly, annoying, moronic wicked witch was on vacation. and now she's back and we all have to put up with her laughable, pathetic behavior again? dream is over. at least I get some free entertainment out of it.

My mother in law is coming in on Thursday. I am overjoyed. She is staying for 11 days. Did I mention she is staying for ELEVEN DAYS????

SAP...to know it is to despise it. And then when you need help for the damn thing, no one calls or e-mails you back. Bastards.

When my husband says he is tired. EXCUSE ME??? Are you the one getting up with Spencer two to three times a night? Are you the one rocking the little pain in the...the little angel back to sleep when he is bound and determined that 3 fucking 30 am is the most marvelous time to start the day? NO? I didn't think so. Spare me with you are tired. Seriously, do men think before they open those giant traps they call mouths?

Having to go to Supermercado Vallerta to get a goddamn gallon of milk because freaking Vons, Albertsons and Ralphs are on strike and I feel to guilty to cross the picket lines.

Could these stupid fires have been at a worse time? Between them and the transit strike it is a miracle if I make it to work:
a) on time
b) before I pee my pants
c) before I whip out a semi automatic machine gun and kill all the stupid people on the road annoying me, and then my husband

Of course I read them! Look how often I post them!

Latest...
Big bosses who don't approve your expense report in a timely manner so now I have to wait another two weeks to get the $600 I have coming to me. If they would just give me a corporate AmEx, this wouldn't happen.

When your co-worker asks for your help on an Excel spreadsheet because they are
a) too lazy to even attempt to work it out
b) too stupid

Who the fuck made me Excel spreadsheet queen?

I totally understand about the poop etiquette. Totally rude. Happened to me yesterday.

Having Michelle reprimand me because I haven't posted in a year. Blah, do you even read these things????

Yikes....

I hate automatic staplers. For some reason I can't get them to work!

That bitch better not be in the bathroom now.

Ok... so I hate it when I click on a link in an email or an IM and instead of opening a new browser, it opens in the teeeny tiny launchcast box which kicks me out of launch and so I have to go back in again...

boys... waiting for boys... wanting boys... all of it!

One more... reruns! How can they ALREADY be showing reruns??? I hate tv... I may get rid of it... (ok that's only righteous indignation talking)

Ass. Shit. Fuck. Coochie.

The peeve of the day....
I hate when the blogs that I read religiously (ok, there is just one and I check it every few days) are not updated often enough. By that I mean that they are not updated often enough to make me happy.

It is all about me today. And that is not a peeve.

So, how is it that the censors decide what words are eliminated and/or edited out on movies that are shown on TV... How can it be that b@tch is okay to say but we have to get rid of a$$, sh!t, etc... (ok so I'm editing the words just because... I don't actually know why). That is slightly disturbing.

I don't think some people know the poop etiquette...

I am peeved that my dr's office called today at lunch time to move my 4:30 PM appt up in the day... WTF... I made it for the time I made it because I didn't want to have to miss work... I went but still...

TMI Alert. Read on at your own risk.
I hate it when I go into the bathroom at work to take a crap and someone else comes in when I am halfway through, so I have to wait until she leaves before I can finish, but she is waiting until I leave, and I don't want to just sit there in silence, waiting and waiting when it is that mean bitch who should leave since I was there first. Poop etiquette dictates that she should stop after the pee and come back later when the bathroom is unoccupied.

ok... so I will fully admit that I am having an over reaction or excessive reaction blame it on hormones... :) but...

WTF - how can it only be the 2nd (3rd?) week of new shows and we are already getting reruns from goddamn nbc... I hate them. Once friends is off the air I'm never watching nbc again... fuckers

ok... so maybe I'm crabby but whatever... like that's new... :) but here are today's:
1 - I hate the fact that although I'm almost 30 [side bar this is my new obsession... ALMOST 30], I had to buy scooby doo papertowels because that was the only style of 3 pack of sparkle brand that my grocery store carried... don't even get me started about my obsession with only buying sparkle... it is the brand I like and I don't have the space for 6 rolls and one roll is too few...
2 - I hate how the channels make a BIG deal about the fact that it is an "all new" episode... HELLO it is only October and they ONLY just started the new season like the last week of September [do you remember when we were kids and the shows started in like August and ran through May... those were the days]...
3 - I have this one brownie in my troop that I may kill... nothing calms her down... NOTHING
On a totaly cool note, I got an email from my friend that I hadn't heard from in years and I knew her when we were in elementary school... :)

AAARRRGGGHHH!!! Why can nothing be easy??

1 - We waited at the vet's this morning for 45 min for a procedure that took 2 min.
2 - The biggest aarrrgghh for me today!! So I was supposed to call the Leschi school where my brownie meetings are to be held and find out what room number we get. I am told by snotty receptionist that we had to have a permit 10 days prior to the event and I had to call this other number. Now what the heck?? My volunteer coordinator had already taken care of that I thought... aaarrrggghhh.... this is becoming more trouble than it is worth to me. :(

I am having a good day because I am wearing a fab new pair of jeans. Levi's 515 bootcut. They come in plus sizes and were only $34.99 at Mervyn's. http://www.us.levi.com/fal03a/levi/prod/l_prod.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2834971&bmUID=1065456189956

AAKK 2 more!!

I hate turtlenecks... I don't know what I was thinking when I bought this sweater but the neck!! oh the neck...

I don't know what I was thinking when I got dressed this morning in a smokey gray sweater and olive gray pants... I look like a rainstorm waiting to happen...

AAAGGGHHH!!!! What a Monday -
So here are my Monday Morning rants in no particular order -
1 - the fact that even though I live less than 1 mile from my work, I can't get there on time ever!
2 - Back of the neck headphones
3 - Back of the neck headphones that get tangled in my hair because I haven't had a moment to put it up yet.
4 - The fact that apparently I can eat very little lately without feeling sick
5 - Feeling sick
6 - Trying to make my lunch and having to leave the kitchen because I feel so sick...
7 - Having to call and move Minka's vet appointment because I have a staff meeting at 12:00 and her appt is at 11:30...
8 - The fact that the stupid vet's office wasn't able to take her on Sat which they told me originally they could but they couldn't because there was still construction going on at their new office which makes me want to say... then why did you move in??!!
9 - Super runon sentences. ;)