Holy crap!

Enormous breach of poop etiquette! Even worse than the one that occurred on October 24, 2003.

I walked into the bathroom. It reeked of bleach, so at least I knew it is clean. As I headed into the stall, I also caught a faint whiff of someone's doody, so I pulled my shirt up over my nose and breathed shallowly through that. As I was going about my business (#1 only) I heard a flush. Then I heard the tp holder rolling as Crapper went in for a wipe. Then I heard it rolling again, then I heard it rolling again, and again, and again. Crapper wiped no less than five times in an obvious breach of etiquette. She should have remained silent until the other occupant left the bathroom.

It wasn't over yet. I flushed and was pulling up my pants when I heard her flush again. I thought, surely she wasn't planning to exit her stall while I was in there. I left my stall and she walked brazenly out of hers. I had to see Crapper's true identity!

And it still wasn't over yet. Then she started talking to me! WTF was she thinking? God damn Crapper.