Things Certain People Should Not Do
If you are corpulent man, you should not be showing a wide equator of pale skin in the gap between your too small sweatshirt and your mismatched sweatpants, thus searing the corneas of innocent commuters who see you in the crosswalk.
If you are pushing a stroller, you should not be walking side-by-side with your friend who is also pushing a stroller, thus blocking the entire path for childless people in a hurry.
If you are pregnant, you should not wear a short shirt with your panel pants showing at least four inches of that soft blue scoop holding in your fetus. However, one can only guess that the innocent commuters who spied you in the crosswalk were grateful not to be seeing yet another stretch of big, round belly on their way home from work and thus thank you for making sure that your garments overlapped.
If you are pushing a stroller, you should not be walking side-by-side with your friend who is also pushing a stroller, thus blocking the entire path for childless people in a hurry.
If you are pregnant, you should not wear a short shirt with your panel pants showing at least four inches of that soft blue scoop holding in your fetus. However, one can only guess that the innocent commuters who spied you in the crosswalk were grateful not to be seeing yet another stretch of big, round belly on their way home from work and thus thank you for making sure that your garments overlapped.
1 Comments:
Also, if you are corpulant man and you are on vacation. Button your shirt most of the way up. I understand you're on vacay, but seriously, none of us need to see that swath of skin rapidly turning red as it burns.
Totally agree on pregnant lady & mommies one. One more for pregnant lady... if you are 1 week within your due date, don't gasp suddeny. Office mate tends to think she may have to call security immediately.
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