Tuesday, January 11, 2005

I think I'm going to lose my mind

Customer e-mail #1: "Your web site does not make sence to me. I paid, but now I CAN'T get the info... I want my money back please."

My reply: "...your transaction did not go through as there was a denial of your credit card number by our processing company. It may be that you entered some information incorrectly, but as it stands now there has been no charge. If you would like to try again and still have a problem, we can investigate further. Thanks."

Customer e-mail #2: "I paid your fee once, why does it want me to pay again to use the service?"

My reply: "We apologize if you did not receive our original response from your first e-mail. However, your credit card transaction did not go through as there was incorrect information entered in the form. Please try purchasing again. If you continue to have problems, please let us know. Thanks."

Customer e-mail #3: "I PAID FOR...BY CREDIT CARD. ..DO YOU HAVE TO PAY AGAIN ?...What good is it? PLEASE EXPLAIN."

My reply: "Apparently, you are not reading our responses. Again, your credit card was not charged because the information you provided was either incorrect or incomplete. This is why you do not have access...You will need to go through the purchase process again. If there is still confusion, please call me at...Thank you."

Customer e-mail #4: "Do you pay more than one fee? Once does not get you all of your package?"

My reply: "You are a fucking idiot! What part of YOUR CREDIT CARD DID NOT GO THROUGH do you not understand?! It is people like you that make me want to jump off a bridge! How the hell did I get stuck doing this shit for a living having to placate stupid people like you? I'm sorry, "placate" is probably too big a word for you to understand. Just GO AWAY! Does that make "sence?!!!"


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